Yesterday I was talking with a friend who is really dynamic - does everything well, knows everyone, always busy, always well dressed, that sort of person. She's a great friend because I've known her for years
Everyone seems to find her intimidating - she finds this really funny. How can she be intimidating when she thinks she's rubbish at everything?
What's happening is that she is seeing the soft squidgy bit inside that can't even stand up on its own - the "blacmange" central core, that only she can see.
Everyone around her is seeing the dynamic, confident and active person I described at the start - her external suit of armour.
My friend is comparing her blancmange core with everyone else's armour, which is why she can't see what others see.
At the same time, everyone else is comparing their hidden blancmange (that only they can see) with her suit of armour!
Confusing!
We all have blancmange and we all have armour. The trick is knowing that you are the only person that can see your blancmange and that you are only seeing other people's armour!
Possibly that knowledge may be able to give you a bit of confidence when faced with people like my friend.